Will this be my rant blog instead of the nice beauty journal I envisioned?

I’m not sure if I said this before, and I’m too lazy to go back and look, but anyway…

I have herniated cervical discs, it started out about 12 years ago with 2 herniated discs, but they have been deteriorating and now I’m up to 4 herniated discs and 2 bone spurs. I just had a new MRI about a month ago and discovered the latest herniated disc and bone spur. If anyone asks, I have no problem explaining what a bone spur is, or anything about my diagnosis, meds, etc. But won’t waste the time and space here now, since I doubt many are interested in the details.

I’m in pain all the time, but some days are still better than others. Over the years, I had some treatments that worked wonderfully, and others that just caused more pain. Unfortunately for me, the treatments that worked wonderfully stopped working, and I’ve mostly been through treatments that do nothing or cause more pain for the last 8 years or so. In order to control my pain, I’m on enough meds to kill most normal people, you build up a tolerance, so then you have to increase the dosage to have enough to control your pain. I’m close to the limit and my doctor doesn’t want to increase my meds anymore in case I’m in an accident, need surgery, develop cancer, or any number of reasons why I’d need that top dosage. Anyway, this means I have more bad days than ever, and that puts me in a bad mood!

Because of this, I know that I really should avoid commenting on blogs. I’m crabby and have no patience for stupidity, so instead of being understanding when someone is having a brain-fart, I want to get in their face and tell them that they are a moron. More often than not, the person doesn’t deserve that, we all make mistakes, including me! And it’s usually something minor or silly that the blog owner and other commenters either ignore or gently explain. So…I have mostly been a good girl, and walk away from the computer, or at least change to a different post or blog…don’t let it get to me and keep my fingers off the keyboard, but I have let loose a few times with mostly sarcastic remarks.

But I don’t want to do that anymore, if something is annoying me, I want to be able to vent, but I don’t want to cause problems for my favorite bloggers, so I won’t make my sarcastic comments there, but… this is my blog where I can say anything I want.  If I’m feeling bitchy, then I can bring it here. I don’t really want to cause drama or hurt anyone, I am not normally a mean person either, but yeah, when I’m in pain I’m feeling mean and I’ll just bring it here and let it out.

I just wanted to explain that to the few who have subscribed, and anyone who stumbles in here, and wonders why so much ranting and raving? It’s also a warning, because some people may get annoyed or angry with the things I am saying. In which case they should probably avoid my blog!


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